Dr. Snarky Sparks is the first to admit she was shocked, shocked, to learn that there is gambling going on in this industry. But as they say, ?Here are your winnings.? The good, beneficent, and nosy doctor takes to heart the injunction ?First do no harm.? But what?s the harm in a little gossip? This is some of what I?ve heard on my rounds this month: <b>Commissioner Wood living at commissioner Lynch?s house.</b> Don?t go jumping to conclusions. They have this arrangement. One CPUCer is staying elsewhere while her SF apartment undergoes a remodel. The other one bunks amidst the dry wall and plumbing parts a couple of nights a week. <b>Other arrangements, for better or worse.</b> PG&E lobbyist Lorraine Albrecht may tie the knot with Assemblymember Dario Frommer. The L.A. Democrat is one of those hoping to be second in line to the new assembly speaker Fabio Nu?ez. Frommer?s chief of staff was shocked, very, I tell you, and declined to comment on whether a wedding date had been set, saying it was for his boss to announce. So, this doc decided to do a little snooping of her own. Thinking I could wrap up a nice faux-crystal vase for the couple, I checked the national bridal registry. Alas, no matches. But I shall not rest. <b>Pssssssst . . . pass the money to L.A., please.</b> Los Angeles Department of Water & Power commissioner Leland Wong stepped into and out of office after his employer, Kaiser-Permanente, suggested he step aside. It appears Mr. Wong perhaps misused company money and staff to raise buckaroos for city politicians. Wong?who had joined the LADWP board of commissioners only last April?allegedly used company personnel and money to organize political fund-raisers and gave elected officials expensive?of all the boring things?tickets to sporting events and cultural performances, in apparent violation of California campaign finance laws, according to Jim Anderson, Kaiser?s director of communications. Kaiser reported the alleged misuse of funds to the city of Los Angeles Ethics Commission, which has launched its own investigation. It also didn?t hesitate to caution Kaiser to keep its lips sealed on the names of the elected officials who benefited from Wong?s activities. Makes you curiouser, doesn?t it? After resigning from Kaiser, Wong moved on, vacating his post with LADWP, said Randy Howard, communications director for the power agency. Newspaper accounts of Wong?s resignation said he had raised bucks for L.A. mayor James Hahn, but a spokesperson for the mayor would not confirm that report. A trip to the ethics commission and perusal of its filings showed Wong gave $500 to the mayor?s sister, Janice Hahn, for her successful run for a city council seat in 2001 and contributed to the campaign of city attorney Rocky Delgadillo. <b>?Show me the money? and show ?em the cell.</b> An alleged attempt to appropriate money out of Calpine led to an indictment listing 39 counts against four former government officials, including Allen Sawyer, former executive director of the governor?s office of criminal justice planning and the San Joaquin County sheriff. Not too reassuring, is it? The United States Attorney, Eastern District of California, noted that two companies?including SMTM LP (which stood for guess what? ?Show Me The Money?) had ?agreed to represent Sunlaw Energy in connection with its efforts to secure permission to build a power plant at the Port of Stockton.? The cabal, which includes a former county supervisor, allegedly ?threatened that if Calpine failed to withdraw its bid? to build a power plant at the port, the group would retaliate by creating political opposition to another Calpine plant in Alameda County. The ?Show Me The Money? company stood to gain a healthy $2 million commission from Sunlaw if its plant were built on the site, according to the U.S. Attorney. Sheriff Baxter Dunn also allegedly messed with the G-men when they were investigating former supervisor Lynn Bedford. <b>Can?t live with ?em. Can?t get a dividend either.</b> Given the sorry state of health care?and energy care?all PG&E employee Clifford Bryan got was two aspirins and no financial relief. My advice, Cliffy, is to take ?em and call me in the morning. He, and apparently his lawyer, were stressed out over the utility?s bankruptcy?like the rest of us?only he sought workers? compensation benefits. He reportedly was overwhelmed by the potential of losing his job and his $200,000 in PG&E stock. Bryan was on the front lines in Bakersfield?no, not one of those linepersons that go out in the middle of the night fixing up storm damage along a deserted farm road, but at the public customer desk listening to crabby customers. A Court of Appeals panel in San Francisco just didn?t feel his pain and stopped short of recommending another stockbroker. <b>Playground ?time out? for Peevey?</b> In a case of Mike Peevey admitting to peevishness, the California Public Utilities Commission prez gave himself a grade of ?C-? in the subject of ?civility.? Peevey often lashes out at fellow commissioners, even in the very public commission business meetings. And he is not shy about saying he ?eagerly awaits 2005.? That would be the year the terms of his fellow commissioners Loretta Lynch and Carl Wood expire. Peevey pines away in between gavels for another commissioner like Susan Kennedy. Dr. Sparks hopes to avoid Peevey?s peevishness while she?s on her rounds?at least until she?s got a few snappy comebacks lined up. Feel free to contact Dr. Sparks with your nuggets o? gossip so she can brighten your day.